
Long ago in an age undreamed of, a man named Ronnie James Dio made himself known to the world. No one knows where he came from, but of one thing we are certain. Dio wasn't born to a woman, and there is no record of his youth. Rather, he seems to have been formed from the energy of pure Rock by the elders of N'huren-On-High. N'huren-On-High was a group of mages, and their name roughly translates into English as ELF. As the front man of this group, he achieved moderate success, but was mainly noticed by another mage, Ritchie Blackmore, who joined the ranks of N'huren-On-High, or ELF, then led the group forth into uncharted territory under the name RAINBOW. For several years, Rainbow killed giants, trolls, elder gods, and generally rocked the land. But all was not well in the land of Rainbow, and soon Lord Dio would face his next challenge, that as the leader of Black Sabbath.
Witness, o mortals, the terrible might of Hoochie Koochie Lady! Cower at the madness of Stargazer! Tremor with fear at the recounting of the tale of ghosts in the studio, both man and bovine! Hear with both your ears and your soul as one of your hosts imparts the wisdoms endowed upon him by Lord Dio himself in a Vermont Mall! Quake with awe at the tales of douche-baggery concerning guitarists with large, beastly egos! And bow to the mind shattering revelations of a man, hoisted above a stage, desperately trying to defecate on a drummer!
For as surely as Dio rocked all who have heard his silver voice, he has conquered the known world of rock, and all before he was forty. But know, o listener, that Dio would go on to much more greatness. Dio would soar like a phoenix on wings of fire, and dominate the 80s...but THAT....that is a story for another episode...
Witness, o mortals, the terrible might of Hoochie Koochie Lady! Cower at the madness of Stargazer! Tremor with fear at the recounting of the tale of ghosts in the studio, both man and bovine! Hear with both your ears and your soul as one of your hosts imparts the wisdoms endowed upon him by Lord Dio himself in a Vermont Mall! Quake with awe at the tales of douche-baggery concerning guitarists with large, beastly egos! And bow to the mind shattering revelations of a man, hoisted above a stage, desperately trying to defecate on a drummer!
For as surely as Dio rocked all who have heard his silver voice, he has conquered the known world of rock, and all before he was forty. But know, o listener, that Dio would go on to much more greatness. Dio would soar like a phoenix on wings of fire, and dominate the 80s...but THAT....that is a story for another episode...
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